A confusion of dreams

I’m ‘home’ and see dad mowing or landscaping. It looks nice, and i’m noticing all the different kinds of seedlings that are just starting to take off and become little trees. One of them seems odd but i love it. It’s like a pussy willow branch but instead of the little furry flowers, it has purple and yellow pansies. I’ve never seen one like it before and wonder if it’s a new kind or if it’s a wild natural hybrid. As i continue to walk towards my destination (the house, i guess) i see a fast moving body of water pouring over one part of the yard creating what looks like a black mud wave. It’s really churning up that patch of ground and all kinds of interesting rocks and artifacts are being dredged up. I begin to pick up some of the pretty rocks but then put them back down because i don’t know what the plan for them is but as i turn to walk away from the deluge, i see something green on the ground. I pick it up and hold it up so ?? can see it and say “It’s Jade!” but even as i’m saying it’s jade i know that it’s not, it’s another common green mineral but i can’t remember the name (malachite).

I still have the green stone and i’m standing at a check-in desk. There’s a girl standing at the same desk but i’m not sure if she works there or lives there. She’s blond and fair skinned and wearing green plaid. It turns out her name is also Lesley. She suggests that maybe we should live together and it seems perfectly reasonable to me. We compare last names. Her last name is a Gaelic word for ?January (or maybe Winter) and i can see the word as she says it but can’t remember it now or how it sounded. I told her mine and we agreed mine was boring and we should use her name. As we’re talking, the space we occupy is an apartment with wood floors. The wood is light (Norwegian wood?) and the place is very sparsely decorated. This is where the other Lesley lives. As i scope out the place i mention that i have thousands of records and cd’s and books that i’d want to keep. She laughs and looks shocked at the same time. I tell her about a place i want to go see sometime. It’s at the southernmost point of a large lake in the middle of California. On a map California is like half the United States i think. San Francisco is in the upper right side. The lake goes from the bottom of SanFran way down almost to the desert. I tell her the name of the place (i’ve dreamt this place/map before but can never remember the name) and how i think it would be like a paradise because probably nobody ever goes there because it’s not convenient to anything and not on a path to somewhere else people would want to go. It IS the destination. Then we’re walking on a cobblestone walk in an old city. I think it’s in Scotland. It’s windy and cold. We go back to the apartment and there’s an amazing looking electric guitar in a stand. I pick it up to make it makes sounds and it’s got an interesting feel to it. Like the strings are hard light and i can bend them into all kinds of tones. A guy with long hair comes in. It’s her roommate and the guitars owner. He takes the guitar from me and goes off into another room. His room, i guess. I can hear songs coming from where he went.

That’s the tip of what i remember. There was a lot more but i can’t catch a wisp of the others. Good dreaming night between the full moon and my feverish brain. Eanáir is the (Irish) Gaelic for January. Scots Gaelic would be similar i suppose.

Pink Light

I’m in Las Vegas with my long-time-ago best friend Susan but it’s ‘Now’ and we’re both adults. For some reason, i’m barefooted. We go into a casino and i’m worried that the casino people are going to ask me to leave because i don’t have shoes on but as Susan and i are walking through the part of the casino where the shops and restaurants are and i’m looking at other peoples’ feet. I notice all the women have shoes on but they’re all wearing sandals, and even with their pedicured feet and toe jewelry they’re all jack-toed and bunioned and have generally ugly looking feet. I feel that even if mine are bare and the nails aren’t polished, i’m still not as gross as any of those other women. I point that out to Susan and she just laughs and says “I told you not to worry about it.” We go into a gambling room. It’s kind of dark, dank and icky looking (reminds me of downstairs at Charlie Goodnight’s) and we decide to try the next one. To get from one casino to another, we don’t have to go outside because there are these short tunnels between the walls of the different casinos. The tunnels are stucco’d and the floor is dirt. We stick our heads through one of the tunnels into the next casino but it doesn’t look fun there, so we go further to another tunnel. We go into the gambling room. It’s a combination gambling room and theatre but the show hasn’t started yet. The dealer is sitting behind his table. The table is a half circle and he’s in the middle. There’s one other person at the table but all the other people (maybe twenty or so) are seated around the theatre waiting for the show to start. We get some cards from the dealer and the casino lady brings us some drinks even though we didn’t even order any. My drink is in highball glass. Something in ginger ale. The ginger ale is very good and strong. I drink it down pretty quickly because it has a lot of ice in the glass. There are three round lights over the dealer. They’re like fluorescent tubes but circles. Neon i guess, but the circumference of the tubes is bigger than neon tube normally is. The light is flamingo pink and shining in my eyes so brightly i’m having difficulty seeing. It feels like i’m wearing contacts and the light is getting stuck between the contact and my eyeball so everything is a blur. The casino lady notices that i’m squinting and asks if i would like for the lights to be turned off. I tell her yes and i tell her that the light makes it feel like i’m wearing contacts even though i don’t wear any. She gives me a look like i’ve said something odd and goes to where the light control is. I wish she’d taken my drink order before she left because i’m thirsty for more of that ginger ale drink. I realize Susan and i aren’t even playing our cards and wonder if the dealer is going to get mad.

That’s all i remember. Odd dream. Mostly what struck me about didn’t strike me until i was awake and walking to my car to go to work. That pink light was uncomfortable bright and left me feeling quite disturbed even awake. It got me thinking about Philip K. Dick and the pink light beams he saw and i wondered for a minute if i’d been abducted by space aliens. And then i laughed at myself for thinking that. But really… it WAS very bright and disturbing. I assume i’d feel “probed” or something wouldn’t i? I can’t remember exactly what PKD said about the pink light. A means of communication from space travelers to us? I forget. Sometimes i think he was insane but sometimes i think that he was right and “the empire never ended.” Reality is so fluid sometimes.

Piano Man

I’m in the Manassas house. There are two guitars on a bench-like table next to the piano. Both guitars are beautiful but one is unusual in that it’s made entirely of black wood and is so dark it seems to absorb the light. The silver strings really stand out against the darkness. I pick it up and strum it to see if it’s in tune. It has a lush rich sound. Neither guitar has a case but each has a kind of cloth shroud they’ll fit into. The one that goes with the black guitar is calico quilt and i use it to rub all the smudges off the guitar and then put the guitar in the sack. I put the other guitar in its sack too. There’s a coat rack – a 2x4 about six feet long with pegs sticking out of it – right next to the piano and hang the guitars in their shrouds up by a loop of material that’s sewn on to the bag. Now my attention turns to the piano. I play a few notes to see if it’s in tune and the lower register keys sound high and broken. I open the top of the piano to see what’s going on with the strings and i’m horrified to see that the mallets and strings are mangled.

Time jump to the incident with the piano: Dad is hanging up the coat rack thing and the top of the piano is open. He drops the hammer he’s using and it goes crashing onto the mallets and breaks them. Back to ‘now’…

I’m kind of confused why my alarm hasn’t gone off yet but go ahead and look up a piano repair business in the yellow pages of a phone book. As soon as i call the number, there’s a man at the door. He comes in through the front door and looks at the damaged piano. He tells me he would take it with him and fix it. I ask him how much it will cost and he tells me $130.00. I’m surprised and tell him i was afraid it would maybe cost nearly as much as the piano is worth. He laughs as he pushes the piano through double doors going out to where the carport would’ve been in real life. There’s just an empty field outside the door and the mans pick-up truck is parked in the middle of it. He pushes the piano towards the truck as i ask him when it will be fixed. He tells me a day that’s three weeks out and i tell him that he can keep it ‘til the first week of August because there’s no rush. The first week in August will give him four weeks. He’s surprised and pleased to have some extra time and drives off.

Back inside the house i’m wondering what time it is and why my alarm hasn’t gone off. I look up at a clock on the wall, the kind of clock you see in institutional type places – just big and round and plain, except it has roman numerals (it seems like my dream clocks generally do have roman numerals) and i do a double take because the clock is at three o’ clock! I realize that i’m in big trouble at work because i didn’t call in to tell them i would be out of the office. As i’m shutting the double doors i start to lock the storm doors and realize if i do that, nobody will be able to open them to unlock the front doors so i leave the storm doors unlocked. I close the double doors – they slide together – and lock them. I notice the piano is back in its spot and i’m confused. I open the top and see that the hammers and mallets have been glued in like the man was in a hurry. It’s all jumbled looking. Cameron is there and i ask her about the piano. She tells me that the man brought the piano back and told her he had to be away for awhile and would fix the piano properly when he returned. I didn’t understand what she was telling me and notice a piece of paper with some writing in pencil on it lying on the piano bench. I can’t make sense of the writing but i think the man had to go to his National Guard thing and will be gone for two weeks. I play some notes on the piano and it sounds good except that the lower registers play high notes and i realize i didn’t specifically ask for the man to tune the piano and wondered if that would cost extra. I’d thought it would all be included in the fixing.

I’m very confused about the time and go downstairs to my bedroom. It’s dark and i check my alarm clock to see why it didn’t go off. It’s still too early and i’m torn between going back into my bed and sleeping some more or, since i’m already up, taking a shower. As i’m trying to make up my mind Strawberry Fields wakes me up for real.

I’m not sure that i get the symbolism of the dream yet. Maybe it will reveal itself to me as the day goes on. Am i the damaged piano? Repairable but out of tune?

tiresome dreams

I’m at work but the only thing familiar about it is that Betty is still my manager. It’s night time. I was out sick during the day and have to work all night to make up for being out. We’re part of some marketing campaign and i have no idea what i’m supposed to be doing. As usual, Betty has complete and unwavering faith in my abilities even when i don’t and she’s all peppy and throwing out ideas. I realize i can’t even pretend to make an effort anymore and decide to leave. This building we’re in is very confusing. I walk out a door and can’t find my car anywhere. There are people in the parking lot, only shadows. They’ll kill me if they see me. I go back into the building, realizing i’m trapped until Betty wants to leave because i’m parked where she’s parked and i’ll never be able to figure out how to get back to that side of the building from the inside. I only remember an upward staircase through a reception area. When i get back to my office, Betty is in there doing some kind of craft with paper cutouts and glue. She shows me that she’s got a big paper grocery bag (the kind with handles) that’s full of supplies. I tell her that i really need to get to my car so i can go home and sleep because i’m going to need to get up early to go to work even after working all night. She didn’t realize how late it was and is worried that Bill will be mad at her for being so late. We go back to the staircase and reception area just like i remembered, but then we had to cut through somebody’s private office and make our way through the darkness until we get to the double glass doors of the “formal” entrance. I’m relieved because i can see my car. Betty and i part and now i’m driving along an unfamiliar road. I’m in ?Saint Louis and i’m lost. The road is a two-lane country road and it’s all dark. I come to the outskirts of some little town and see a fast food restaurant (KFC?) that looks open. I decide to stop there and try to call somebody to help me.

I’m asleep in my room. I think it’s the house in Wappinger’s Falls. There’s a window behind my head, and there’s a window on the wall to my right. I look to the bed on the right wall and see myself asleep in that bed. It occurs to me that since it’s myself in the other bed it would be safe to make out with myself but when i move over to that bed and start to go down on myself, i realize i can’t do it and my other self turns into the sabretooth. I'm disgusted with myself for thinking about making out with 'me' and go back to the other bed fall asleep.

When Strawberry Fields came i tried to get up and realized i still didn't feel well. Another day out of work. I hope i don't dream tonight and wake up feeling good tomorrow. There were other dreams but i don't remember enough to bring back the memories of them. Cars. Driving. Being lost. Same ol' same old.

a sci-fi dream

Two guys and i are travelers. We’ve just arrived to a new world in our transport. Our vehicle is sort of bus-like and silver on the outside, like an Airstream trailer. We’re strapped into our reclined chairs. The leader man unbuckles himself and tells us that he’s going to go out and explore a bit. As he’s saying that i can see large black spiders on the ground outside. They’re about the size of foot stools but they don’t scare me at all. It’s curious because it appears that we’re inside a large white room with linoleum floor. I’m not sure if we’re in a different “world” or just a different “time” and feel uneasy. The leader gets out of the vehicle and walks across the linoleum. He reaches a white wall and an opening appears so he goes through. The other guy and i get out of the vehicle. There’s a television with some couches arranged around it, like in a hotel lobby. I get comfortable on a couch while the man searches through the channels for something to watch. Because the room is so completely white, it’s impossible to know its dimensions. It feels like big empty space the way the sound seems to disappear and the air feels light. While the man is still messing with the television, a naked baby (cherub?) flies into vision and lands on the other couch. It’s a fat, happy little white baby. It laughs and the man and i begin to convulse. We are caught in some kind of blue light electrical net. We’re helpless. The baby stops laughing and flies away. We wonder what kind of entity it is.

It’s much later. I’m in a lab with a different man. He’s skinny and pale and wearing a white lab coat. He makes me a little uncomfortable. I think he’s the baby but all grown. He’s teaching me something. We have to go to another place where the equipment has been set up. I’m riding a bicycle with the pale man on the back. He doesn’t weigh anything but i’m having trouble controlling the bike. We’ve come to a stop light. On the other side of the intersection, the road is divided. The light turns green but i’m still concerned that cars will come and hit me. The bike is very wobbly because of how slow i’m going. Steering is so hard! I can’t stay to the right and am just concerned about getting across the road that i swerve to the left and go wrong way up the left side of the divided road. I get back over to the right side right away though because the “division” is a just short a grass island. I apologize to the man for taking us on the wrong side and putting us in danger. He’s unemotional and cold and doesn’t seem to be concerned that we could’ve been hit by oncoming cars. I realize that there are no other cars on this road but still shouldn’t have veered into the oncoming lane. We get to a building that reminds me of a library. We go inside. It might be a library but with all the books gone. On one of the tables there’s a machine and that’s apparently the equipment that i need to work with. I can see the blue lights. It looks like a copying machine. I’m afraid the man will laugh and i’ll be trapped in the blue net again.

And CUT. Sci-fi dream. Pretty cool. I didn’t know any of the people in this dream. The white room is like the prison in THX 1138. Great movie. I think i’ll watch it again soon. Maybe the movie's message is the inspiration for the dream. The spiders were the one normal seeming thing in the dream i felt comfortable with.

My pearl earrings

I’m on a trip with Scott and we’re in a cool forest-y place like a national park campground. It smells like pine trees and wood smoke. We’ve gone to the little canteen to pick up a few things – bread, water, snacks… as we’re checking out i decide to buy a pack of cigarettes. None of the brands are any i’ve ever heard of and i point to a random brand behind the lady that the counter. They turn out to be those long skinny brown kind from back in the day. (I don’t even know if they still make those and can’t remember what they’re called.) As we leave the store, we’re approaching the mall i go to sometimes in dreams. Scott’s walking fast and i’m trying to keep up while at the same time trying to light a cigarette but i can’t keep the match lit and walk at the same time. We go into the mall and into an Italian restaurant place. It looks like a kind of fancy place but really it’s just a fast food joint where you order at a counter and bus your own table. Scott and i are talking about something. I forget what now but i think it had something to do with where ever it is we’re going. After we eat i’m throwing out the remains of my meal of some kind of pasta thing with red sauce. After i throw my stuff in the big box-like trash receptacle i see one of my pearl earrings is lying on my plastic tray. I pick it up to see what happened, why it fell off my ear. It’s the one from my left ear. I see that the post has come undone from the pearl. I’m just thankful i found it because i love these earrings. They’re simple pearl earrings except there’s a single fine gold wire that sort of meanders over the pearl from one side to the other, like a hug keeping the pearl from rolling away. I check my right ear to make sure that earring is still there and it comes apart in my hand. Same thing, the post has come off. I’m a little bit upset but think it’s probably not a big deal and a jeweler will be able to glue the post back on but just as i think that thought, the pearl from my right ear breaks in half and falls out of the setting. I’m surprised and a little bit sad.

I do love these earrings! I’ve had them in for about three weeks now. They seem fine but maybe i better give them a rest for a bit after today. Irreplaceable design and all… I've had a lot of traveling dreams for the last several days. In the other dreams i'm either lost or people are leaving me behind. The series started ?Sunday with a high school stress dream probably related to my dissatisfaction with my job right now. Maybe they've all been related to my general malaise.